IBS can be super embarrassing, I get that, but in a bid to help break the poo taboo (one of my fave phrases), I’m sharing more of my story. And yes I will always have my top jeans button popped. Long live smock tops.
You sure you’re ready for this? Let’s go.
1. I’ve started wearing maternity jeans to maximise comfort levels when I’m bloated, which is about 90% of the time. If I’m in normal jeans, I’m likely to have popped the button by lunchtime.
2. My stomach has a tendency to gurgle loudly at really inappropriate times. Watching a film, in the middle of a super intense quiet moment, cue rumble. In a meeting at work during a presentation, gurgle. Always.
3. I’m quite gassy. When I say quiet, I mean very. That’s part of the bloating problem I think. It literally doesn’t matter what I eat. Although funnily enough, I’ve been sneaking glorious baked beans back into my life and haven’t had any issues with them at all. The gut’s a funny old thing.
4. I’ve missed parties, work, cinema trips and trains because of the urgent need to empty my bowels. Sounds nasty, is nasty and is a constant worry to me.
5. I’m the go-to person with friends and family to discuss poo. With my family there is literally no poo taboo. We’re very and I mean very, open with each other. I’m the one they turn to when they need advice on the brown matter. If the cap fits!
6. My shiz does not smell of roses. In fact, sometimes it can be so bad that I have to warn Al to give it 10 minutes. I’m definitely in the market for some Poo Pouri.
7. I have to go to the loo at least twice to three times a day. Although this can be even more if I’m in the midst of a flare up.
8. I can remember one particular flare up which decided to attack while on my 50 minute train journey home where there are NO LOOS! I was in so much pain I had my jeans button undone and was in floods of tears in a huge panic attack, until Al picked me up and whisked me the 10 minute drive home. And yep, this was in front of other fellow commuters.
9. I always know where the nearest loo is, no matter where I am. You never know when IBS might strike and I like/need to be prepared.
10. I have been given a seat on the train before because my bloated belly had given the impression that I was pregnant. Yup. That’s a thing. I always have to juggle the pros and cons with this one.
So there you have it, 10 embarrassing things about my IBS. I’m sure there are tonnes I’ve missed so hit me with yours below.
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