Emma Thompson wrote a line in October’s copy of Red magazine which really resonated with me and I haven’t been able to shake it since. “I wish I’d known that success is a byproduct, not something to be strived for. The process is the most important thing.” This got me thinking about some of my greatest successes and again, what that word means to me.
I feel a huge sense of uncertainty is hanging over my future and on some days I find that thrilling, that I’m ready for that next challenge, and the next I can feel the bubbles of anxiety starting to boil in my chest because uncertainty still scares me. I’ve acknowledged that both of those feelings are allowed and understandable but it doesn’t stop me from feeling confused and unsure.
I’m 5 weeks into CBT for my anxiety and boy, do I feel different. Suddenly I feel more aware of everything. I’m seeing new things. Appreciating new smells and textures. And I’m allowing myself to really embrace my emotions.
March has been a pretty tough month. My IBS has been all over place, I’ve been putting myself under a lot of pressure and have had some tough family stuff going on. I’ve also managed to squeeze in some beautiful baby cuddles and family time to put a smile on my face.
So much good stuff happened in February that I noted it all down to reflect on.