I’m 5 weeks into CBT for my anxiety and boy, do I feel different. Suddenly I feel more aware of everything. I’m seeing new things. Appreciating new smells and textures. And I’m allowing myself to really embrace my emotions.
We couldn’t go all the way to Snowdonia and not attempt to climb Snowdon. However, I’m not entirely sure I knew what I was letting myself in for. But, sod it, because I bloody well did it. I made it to the top. I mean, I should probably say we made it to the top, because Al was there with me and the main reason I made it.
I think it’d be an understatement to say that Al and I needed a break. We’ve both had a lot going on, been under stress, feeling run down and a bit over it. We needed time out and we needed some time away, so booked a mini break to Wales for a bit of a breather. And it was the best decision we could have made.
Slowly but surely our house is being filled with leafy greens of all shapes and sizes and I am all for it. Both my husband and I have become VERY old before our time and now actually look forward to trips to the local garden centres on plant-buying missions, rather than seeing it as a chore.
If you’ve been reading my blog recently you’ll know that my posts have all had a similar theme; IBS battles, heading towards water to heal my mind and reflecting on the things that make me smile. The truth of it all is I’ve been struggling with my anxiety. Really struggling. Over the past 3 weeks I took the decision to do something about it and I wanted to share the truth of it today, in honour of it being Mental Health Awareness Week.
I like to make a note on my phone of all the things I’ve been loving, things that have been putting a grin on my chops and generally bringing me joy, so I have it to look over when I need a boost.
Being near water not only brings back incredibly happy childhood memories, it also makes me feel at ease. I can physically feel the weight lift off my shoulders, I can feel my muscles relax and my troubles and thoughts leave my anxious mind. I could stand and stare into the calming blue forever. Which is why I’m sharing my favourite places to go when I need to breathe deep and exhale…
Sometimes in life you’re lucky to work side-by-side with someone who’s passionate, driven, determined and super creative, which spurs you on. Sometimes in life you’re lucky enough to become work besties with that person. This post is an ode to mine, Sanj, who’s kept me sane for over 7 years and who’s off to have a baby, basically abandoning me for a year. *sobs*
Hands up if you regularly spend your lunch break at your desk, scrolling through Instagram while chowing down on leftover pasta. Keep those hands up if you don’t even take your full hour. Yep, I’m guilty too but recently I’ve been making the effort to fix that, and I’m feeling the difference.
After listening to Fearne Cotton’s new podcast, I’ve been thinking a lot about my happy place. Where I like to go in reality, or sometimes in my mind, to get away from it all. To reconnect with myself. As I started to note it all down, the words flowed easily and it took the form of this poem. It’s something different for me, so I hope you like it.