A weird thing has happened over the past three weeks, I’ve completely forgotten about my IBS. It wasn’t until my therapist asked me how it had been at my latest session, that I realised I haven’t had an IBS flare once over the past three weeks. Shit.
This is the first in a new series I want to try. It’s capturing those embarrassing yet hilarious moments I experience with my IBS. Ones I can look back on and go, oh shit, yeah that happened. Maybe you can relate. Maybe you think, christ, she needs to get her life in order. Maybe you just fancy a laugh at my expense. I’ll take any of the above, I’m not fussy.
I’m 5 weeks into CBT for my anxiety and boy, do I feel different. Suddenly I feel more aware of everything. I’m seeing new things. Appreciating new smells and textures. And I’m allowing myself to really embrace my emotions.
We couldn’t go all the way to Snowdonia and not attempt to climb Snowdon. However, I’m not entirely sure I knew what I was letting myself in for. But, sod it, because I bloody well did it. I made it to the top. I mean, I should probably say we made it to the top, because Al was there with me and the main reason I made it.
I think it’d be an understatement to say that Al and I needed a break. We’ve both had a lot going on, been under stress, feeling run down and a bit over it. We needed time out and we needed some time away, so booked a mini break to Wales for a bit of a breather. And it was the best decision we could have made.
Do you remember when we had that first heat wave a few weeks ago? Well I do, because I immediately panicked that I didn’t have any dresses to wear that would cover me for work and play. I headed to my saviour, ASOS, and ordered this dress and am now convinced it’s the best thing since sliced sourdough with smashed avo on top. Especially for those of us who spend 90% of their life with a bloated IBS tum.
If you’ve been reading my blog recently you’ll know that my posts have all had a similar theme; IBS battles, heading towards water to heal my mind and reflecting on the things that make me smile. The truth of it all is I’ve been struggling with my anxiety. Really struggling. Over the past 3 weeks I took the decision to do something about it and I wanted to share the truth of it today, in honour of it being Mental Health Awareness Week.
I’ll hold my hands up. I am terrible at confirming and then sticking to plans. In particular with my friends. I know it and they know it but they’re too polite to say anything about it. And it’s all down to how my IBS makes me feel.
Navigating life with IBS is messy, painful and full of ups and downs. When you’re flare free, it’s exhilarating, you think you’ve got it. You’re fixed. Then one bad flare comes along and has you rushing from bed to bathroom, multiple times. At least, that’s my experience, which is what I’m sharing today.
Being near water not only brings back incredibly happy childhood memories, it also makes me feel at ease. I can physically feel the weight lift off my shoulders, I can feel my muscles relax and my troubles and thoughts leave my anxious mind. I could stand and stare into the calming blue forever. Which is why I’m sharing my favourite places to go when I need to breathe deep and exhale…